The Ideal Patient

Having had the privilege of being on both sides of the patient doctor relationship, I often ask myself, how can I be the best patient I can be.

If you had asked me this in early medical school I would have likely echoed some paternalistic model of the patient doctor relationship. "Take your pills, show up to appointments, listen to the doctors..." But, having seen what I have seen, now my answer is much different.

Currently, I think the ideal patient that I strive to be has several foundational pillars:

1) The patient takes ownership of their health.

Perhaps the healthiest patient's I have seen use their doctor as more of a consultant as opposed to a boss. The patient understands that they are the captain of their ship, that they are the ones ultimately responsible for their own health. They do not externalize the locus of control. They own their health and take responsibility for both the good and bad. This means that they also know they have to be proactive and educate themselves as much as possible. Notable amongst the individuals that I have seen do this most successfully: they are never 'victims'. Yes, bad things happen to them, but they never take on the 'victim mentality'. Taking on the role of the victim in your health journey leads to learned helplessness and negative consequences ensue.

2) The patient knows their life purpose.

I cannot reiterate enough how critical it is to have a fully defined life purpose. Defining this in every patient is a huge part of my practice. Only by knowing your purpose, your 'why' can you endure the suffering and hardships inherent in life. In keeping your life purpose front of mind you can continue to make the harder, less convenient, but better health decisions on a daily basis. Will power cannot achieve this. A nagging partner cannot achieve this. It must come from within. Once you have your 'why', you can withstand almost any 'how' to achieve it. The clarity of thought that ensues after defining your life purpose is calming and pragmatic, a true paradigm shift from how most people live.

One's 'life purpose' can manifest in so many different ways. For example, I have patient's whose life purpose is centered around children and grand children, centered around faith, centered around a specific community, centered around leaving the world better than they found it... The one consistent quality is that the purpose is focused outside of themselves.

3) The patient remains curious and is willing to experiment in a world filled with uncertainty.

We all want clear black and white answers to questions. Pursuing the complexity of health is anything but black and white. Sure there are clear guardrails, but many answers are not as definite as many patients would like to believe. Coming to peace with this and being open to well thought out and risk stratified experimenting with interventions to improve your health is the sign of a patient that seeks truth over dogma and simplicity. It is only by understanding there is so much we don't know yet that we can realistically have hope that we can change the trajectory of health.

Next time you go to your doctor, see how many of these pillars you currently exhibit. If it's none, that is ok. You can develop these, and a good doctor will be eager to help you do it.